A young woman’s guide to survive a traditional desi wedding

Everyone loves a great Indian wedding, for it’s a wonderful place to see all your cousins and relatives again. The promise of great food, peppy tunes and secretly shared booze may be enough to entice you to attend your relative’s wedding. However, it can also be a potentially deadly minefield of social interaction, quirky traditions and lots of chit chat. In case you’re a woman in your 20’s or 30’s who is planning on attending such an event, then here’s a guide to survive such weddings.

Dodge the aunties who are the true Gossip Girls

You probably won’t be able to shake the feeling that someone’s watching you. And it’s probably because you will be scrutinised by a merry gaggle of aunties. Furiously gossiping away from their perch at a nearby table, should you walk by them you shall be inundated with questions that probe you about your personal life and education. Beware of the cutting words and possible body shaming, for their keen gaze and pressing questions will soon have you spilling your guts. So, flee before you put your foot in your mouth.

You shall receive lots of ‘Friend Requests’ after a wedding

You are sure to be flooded with friend requests and follow requests on social media from people who spotted you at the wedding. (Fair warning: these could be people you never even had the chance to converse with) Perhaps they liked the way you danced or maybe they adored the way you stuffed your face with 3 Golgappe at once; these new acquaintances are here to stay!

The reality is that desi weddings are where future rishtas are made

Once you’ve crossed the tender age of 18, there’s no stopping the people at a wedding you’re attending from plotting your own shaadi. This tends to happen whether or not you happen to know the ‘matchmaker’. Your parents are likely to walk away from the event with no less than 4-5 unofficial marriage proposals from people who were convinced merely by your poise and appearance that you can be their khandaan’s next bahu. So, you can expect your folks to regale you with biographical data of your potential grooms on the way home.

In case you’re not looking to settle down, then best to tell them your relationship status is ‘complicated’ at the moment!

Also Read: 5 Bollywood celebrities who opted for a lovely intimate wedding