Miss you, Ma

Jianl Shah compares and contrastes living in Mumbai and in New York.

Dear Ma,

It’s been six months since I left Mumbai to live in the Big Apple. Since you keep asking me on the phone how the transition was, I decided to put it all on paper for you.

No doubt, everybody gets bowled over by the enormousness of New York City, its brilliant infrastructure, its hustle and bustle round the year. People are courteous too.

It is true that I am in awe of this city, which is slowly captivating my mind. Yet, the memories of years in India remain etched in my mind, especially the last days in Mumbai – hogging on street food as if I will never get to have it again, meeting streams of relatives and that bundling up apprehensions and inhibitions with my clothes, utensils and some home-made food.

The exposure to both the cultures tempts me to compare and contrast the two. Remember how we pictured New York? The city that makes you feel tiny with its jungle of skyscrapers, the city that makes you feel lost with its potpourri of world cultures and crowds thronging the streets.

Well, it is not as simple as a change in address in what is touted as a global village. For me it entailed a change in attitude and even outlook towards life. Now with a slight attitude shift, I can also be part of the concrete jungle, absorbing the world culture and enjoying what the crowds enjoy, including American football. O Ma, People here are as crazed about football as Indians are for cricket. Many even give work a miss to catch up on matches, particularly the upcoming Super Bowl, the grand finale of the league matches.

Our Mumbai is in many ways similar to New York. Both are financial hubs, a melting pot of diverse cultures and languages. Both are coastal cities dealing with crazy traffic, and home of entertainment (Broadway and Bollywood). Finally, both are cities that never sleep. The throngs in subway trains match the madness in Mumbai locals.

But after my ‘honeymoon phase’ with NYC was over, when I started experiencing life as an average Indian American here to stay, small and subtle differences caught my attention. Coming from a tea drinking country, the Starbucks culture is a novelty. I was also pleasantly surprised by the variety of packaged Indian food at Indian groceries playing on your nostalgia of home cooked food.

Also, the Sunday outings back home are now enjoyed on Saturdays and Indian fast food has given way to world cuisine. The busy, busy weekdays leave little scope for socializing as we did with our extended family in Mumbai. Contrary to our image of American Born Confused Desis (ABCD), the second or third generation Indian Americans are clear about their identity and are comfortable with both cultures.

I live in Jersey City and commute to Manhattan practically every day. It is impossible to walk on the streets without bumping into a fellow Indian or more specifically a Gujarati. Indian restaurants are no more confined to Little Indias; tony New York neighborhoods also have Indian restaurants with exotic menus and prices. Indian fashionistas here are more conscious about the brands they are wearing. And of course, it is the whites who crowd yoga studios not browns.

As I write this on the eve of India’s Republic day, it just dawned on me that staying away from homeland makes one more patriotic. Apart from the parade – something we religiously watched every Republic day on Doordarshan – I will miss the jalebis and flag hoisting on our building terrace.

-Jinal Shah
Jersey City

P.S.: Oh, did I mention how much I miss our maid. Everything here is self-service right from assembling furniture from Ikea to cleaning up the house to doing laundry. At times I even miss our loud neighbors as here it is hard to see, leave alone befriend, blokes next door. And, it pinches the pocket to hail a cab every time for short distance, so wish there were auto-rickshaws here too!!!

P.P.S.: I miss you Ma, and your yummy dosas.