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The outbreak of Covid-19 across the globe changed the way we live and look at the world-physically and emotionally. As we continue to usher ourselves into this mould of the new ‘normal’, the repercussions of a post-covid reality continue to create ripples in our lives. Looking from the lens of how it affected the men in India, the social construction of gender was twisted and has taken a new shape.
To ignite the much-needed conversation of ‘post covid evolution of masculinity’ on International Men’s Day, we decided to look at the various aspects of what changed and how it changed for the men in the country, and above all, how it redefined ‘masculinity’ for them .
The Covid-19 outbreak and the aftermath that followed for us is a painful memory that will stay on for long. The Pandemic impacted all of us, regardless of our age, but there sure was a different lens of perception in the resilience shown by women and men in our society. As a woman who was born and raised in Indian society, my experience of witnessing the evolution of masculinity around me post-Covid has been a surreal one, and on the occasion of International Men’s Day, I decided to talk and share my observation of the few men around me.
It was in October 2019 that I started dating the man who is now my husband. We were getting to know each other and during March 2020, COVID entered our lives only to change my perspectives about masculinity. As it was a complete lockdown, we hardly could see each other and I was upset because I wanted to celebrate my birthday with him. When your relationship is slightly new and social distancing becomes the villain in your life, it can be hard for both the partners.
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We got married in January this year and as we were locked inside our homes, I got to know that my definition of ‘toxic’ masculinity in relationships was conditioned because of my previous dating experience. He changed it all and made me realize that men are capable enough to understand a woman’s insecurities. Yes, we have had our low days and we have fought over trivial issues but COVID hasn’t failed us.
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I found a new source of resilience in my own brother, who was stuck in the US, away from family, jobless in the pandemic, but holding fort . it surpised me to see my younger sibling growing up emotionally and accepting his own emotional outbursts with new-found maturity. He had no qualms in showing his emotions. He won over his fears and insecurities by facing them, and above all, accepting them. That got us closer as siblings, this entire life altering experience.